He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
