oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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