If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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