Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
