While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Randomize
