But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Randomize
