How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
it's not cheating when I paid for it
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Randomize
