Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize