Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
