At least make sure they are 18
Why
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
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