Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
love makes seman taste better
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
