He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize
