When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
