Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Randomize
