I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
