I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
