My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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