Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Randomize
