I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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