..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Randomize
