you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize
