awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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