Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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