somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Randomize
