SEEEEXXX PLEASE
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
it glows. i had to have it.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Randomize