I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
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