There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
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