Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
