So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Randomize
