"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
