I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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