you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
Randomize
