my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
Randomize