there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize
