i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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