people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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