glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
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