Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
Randomize
