You smell like stripper and shame
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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