just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
