Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Randomize
