I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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