remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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