I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Randomize
