one might say we're banned from that church
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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