Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
