Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Randomize
