Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Randomize
