You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Randomize
