i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Randomize
