Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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