walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
