I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
